Basic white girl Emily Anderson was reportedly seen moping around her favorite brunch spot in Los Angeles’ Silverlake neighborhood last Sunday, following a brief encounter with Antoine Lebeau, a world-renowned neurosurgeon, vampire, and direct descendant of the French House of Orléans.

“I face-planted on the sidewalk right in front of him,” Anderson recounted. “We locked eyes as he helped me up… I’m pretty sure we shared a moment.”

“I don’t understand what went wrong,” Anderson lamented. “I looked so adorably basic and vulnerable. He should be fangs-deep in my neck by now.”

Anderson’s experience reflects a broader trend among Caucasian women struggling to transform their bubbly, conformist charm into genuine romantic appeal. “The calculus is shifting for BWGs,” explained Arthur Simpson, a self-proclaimed dating market expert. “Especially in the fantasy demographic. People are going Asian whenever they can.”

It remains unclear whether Anderson’s whiteness influenced her fleeting interaction with Lebeau. Still, she remains optimistic about a future reunion, despite his apparent lack of interest. “It’s only a matter of time before our next meet-cute,” she insisted.

Meanwhile, Lebeau hasn’t been spotted in Silverlake since the incident. He was reportedly seen on Monday in Culver City, shopping for furniture with his close friend, OnlyFans model Julius Wolfsen.