A love story 18 years in the making ended in tragedy Friday morning, as Yasuke turned his back on his long-time friend and perennial love interest Megumi. "I'm in a total state of schock", she said. "I thought we were gonna grow old together. He promised to always protect me and do whatever I asked".

Since he has refused to answer her call, even going as far as blocking her on all social media platforms. "I just grew tired of her bullshit" said Yaskuke, who explained that the relationship has been extremely one-sided over the past 12 years. "I've been doing all her homework since 2nd grade. I'm not even sure she knows how to read".

Asked exactly when he reached his breaking point, Yasuke referred to an incident that had taken place earlier that week: "I had my suspicions for a while, but then I ran into Haruto at the dry cleaners. We were both there to pick up her Zork the Dark One costume. She had double-booked us."

Megumi admitted that she is currently managing about 11 childhood promises from various boys in her neighborhood. "Sometimes overlap does happen", she confessed. Despite the initial shock, Yasuke seems to be quickly adapting to his new situation. "I've already started drafting a new promise." he said, specifying that he had not yet identified who the recipient would be. "I'm going to take it slow... And this time I'm going to make sure it includes sex stuff."